Reflections by Bubie

There are so many recollections that I will reflect upon with great joy until they cart me off to the home for the bewildered: Elanor and Ryan jumping out of a cab in front of a cafe on a residential street in Florence where we waited for them to begin our Italian vacation and handing us a card announcing the pregnancy; seeing Elanor in all her 9 month pregnant glory as she managed to walk around the lake in San Marcos the week beforfe Wilken was born; watching Ryan proudly showing off his son at the nursery window looking very impressed as he mouthed "big cajones" while the pediatrician examined Wilken; my first glimpse of Elanor lying in the recovery room, and both of us bursting into tears, as she called out "Mommy... (the first time she had called me that in years), "Isn't he the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?"
I will always remember Wilken's beautiful, unmarred face looking up at me for the first time with his eyes open, his settling into my shoulder as I sang, "Wilken Cooper you should know that your Bubie loves you so....", the rat-a-tat-tat sound he makes in his throat showing his displeasure and frustration, but giving one a chance to redeem the situation before he cries for real, watching Elanor and Ryan working together to get Wilken to latch on and nurse in the hospital and at home...Elanor and Wilken sleeping together on the sofa, and her total surprise at her "fear of the night." What an amazing change, for the first time in one's life to not be able to control whether there is sleep or no sleep, to be at the total beck and call of a 7-1/2 pound human, to be sleepy all the time. Such is parenthood. Rather than humorous pleasure that comes from "what goes around...," I find myself remembering, and empathizing with the total fatigue of those long nights. David and I never did figure out sleeping--that is, Nate and Elanor never slept, so any parent to can feed and respond on demand and still have their kids learn to sleep has our hats off. I bet Elanor and Ryan will figure it out.
The chats with Elanor during the days of watching, changing, and nursing Wilken are days to treasure forever, and the pleasure of watching this young couple together with this baby are a joy as well. While I feel a bit tired as well, and not as able to be my usual witty self in print, these tidbits get lost so easily in time--a record is a special thing. We always say we will remember, don't we, and then often forget. Some things, however, will always be there.... 5/25/05.

New Baby Brother

Lucca (left) and Siena (right), sisters from the same litter, needed some time to sniff out the competition. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? A new baby to snuggle next to or sharpen our claws on? Luckily for us, there haven't been any unfortunate "accidents" outside the litter box, torn up furniture, or lack of cuddling.

Cousin David

David has been wanting to hold Wilken non-stop. He's going to be a great cousin.

Cousin Grey

Grey is 5 in this photo and until later notice the closest cousin in age to Wilken. Not sure if 5 years will be too far apart for them to be good buddies, but we'll do our best to at least have Grey protect him on the playground.

Bubie & Grandpa

I am now officially a Bubie--the fourth generation of Bubies (Yiddish for Bubba, or grandmother I assume) in my family that I remember. What a legacy to aspire to, these wonderful grandmothers. Hard to associate that word with myself, bringing up as it does memories of my own dearly loved Bubie, and our beloved mother, so lost to us now. How mom would have adored this baby! These Bubies made their grandchildren feel that they were the most magnificent part of the universe, and after holding Wilken and staring at his beautiful face, I now begin to understand that he is, in fact, the center of a loving universe and that his Grandpa and his Bubie will reflect that starlight in his eyes.
David has decided to be Grandpa, the name Nate and Elanor called his father. He is wild about any baby, and in particular this one, and pulls rank at drop of a hat to hold the baby. Even as I write this, he has Wilken comfortably asleep on his (rock hard he insists) belly while Elanor takes a much needed nap.
Since 4:00 am on 5/15/05, when we received the call from Ryan and Elanor that her water had broken, we have been in as much of an altered state as they. We began by spending the first twenty minutes bouncing off of each other as we raced around the house trying to get organized, got out of the door by 6:00, made 4 stops, and arrived in San Marcos just in time to see Ryan and Wilken in the nursery window as the pediatrician conducted the first exam. David wrote Ryan a note asking about Wilken's score, and Ryan mouthed back that he was perfect. He is the most adorable baby, delicated yet undoubtedly male features, tiny, and the most comfy, warm bundle one could hope to cuddle.
Elanor has had some tough days physically--pain, tummy problems (the worst day of her life she says), even a urinary tract infection the day after getting home. Nursing itself has been a challenge. Wilken is cute as a button, but a lazy baby, and he and his mommy have been working hard to get this feeding business down. It is still a struggle, but Elanor is commited and he is a growing baby, so that is a great match. She had one melt-down yesterday, deservedly so, but is mostly her usual cheeful, sweet self in spite of her many discomforts.
Ryan is there every, and I mean every, step of the way. They are a splendid team, and he has taken on any task, from accompanying his baby to all tests and procedures, including his circumcision (!), to changing the first poopie diaper. They are starting out wonderfully to be the greatest of parents. Life will get a bit more interesting when we (finally they will breathe in relief) go home, Ryan goes back to work, and Elanor takes over her new job full time.
Time to fix breakfast. I have the easiest of jobs! Enought for 5/21/05.

Sweet Pea

Ryan caught this picture in the hospital. So peaceful...he has no idea what life is all about!

Hard work deserves short breaks

Needless to say, Ryan and Elanor got a little tuckered out with this "new life" they got themselves into. Who said creating a family is easy? At first we thought we may have accidently given birth to an owl. He is wide awake at night and asleep during the day. Ryan thought he might be some kind of milk-breed vampire!

Mom & Son

Elanor in the hospital with Wilken. She is a natural mother!

Grandpa

Grandpa made several trips down to San Diego (San Marcos) to keep up to date with the excitement. From the weekend prior to birth for the external version to back and forth after the birth between working weeks, he hasn't wanted to miss a step. We're eager for Bubie and Grandpa to come back.

Bubie

You can see by Bubie expression that shes a little on the happy side to experience the birth of her 1st grandchild.

Announcing the arrival of Wilken Cooper Van Der Vorste

It is official! Wilken Cooper Van Der Vorste was born at 8:31am, Sunday, May 15, 2005.
Ryan & Elanor spent their last night alone going on a walk around their neighborhood lake, went out to dinner followed by Elanor's favorite dessert (hot fudge sundae), and caught a movie at the local theater. Saturday (5-14-05) was thought of as their last weekend night together because due to the baby's breech position, a scheduled C-Section was planned at 7:30am on Friday, May 20, 2005. Not only was this their last weekend night without being a Mother & Father, it would end up being their last night without a baby!

At 3:40am that morning Elanor got up to go to the bathroom (a typical occurance about every hour). This time she thought she stopped going, but she heard a "blip" and water just kept coming out of her. Luckily for them and their house, it was a perfect position and location for this to happen. She called out to Ryan in bed and he came running to see what was going on. Immediately, they knew it was time to call the Dr. and prepare for not only an early birth but an emergency Caesarian Section. They gathered and packed their necessities along with a few calls to their parents and the adventure began...

Wilken Cooper Van Der Vorste
Birth Day: Sunday
Birth Date: 5-15-05
Birth Weight: 7 lbs., 7 oz.
Birth Length: 18 to 21 inches depending on who measured

Turn Baby Turn

Ryan is using an "old wives tale" given to us from the Acupuncturist to turn the baby. Supposedly, your pinky toes are connected to the uterus and if you stimulate (burn) the pinky toe, the uterus lining will loosen allowing the baby to move from the breech position. Didn't work, but we got an "A" for effort.

Nursery

The nursery is ready to be occupied. We've got the spare room to sleep company and/or a baby boy/girl. We'll just have to wait to find out. Elanor wanted to incorporate a "magical/fairy" theme to the room, but once Ryan painted a tree on the wall and ceiling, Elanor said that the tree would be enough.